Malaysia

I have now been away from home for over 8 weeks. I am a little bit more than half way through this so-called “journey of a lifetime” and I am absolutely exhausted. I woke up last Wednesday, our first day in Malaysia with a dull stomach ache that had been irritating me since before India (probably from the malaria medicine I have been taking) and with only four hours of sleep, lets just say I wasn’t at my best. I was planning on going on a trip to Kuala Lumpur (the biggest city in Malaysia) with all of my friends but as the group began to walk towards the buses I broke down and decided not to go. 

If you know me well, you know that I am a very stable person usually with my feet planted steadily on the ground however, with my physical exhaustion came mental and emotional exhaustion and the next three days became the low point of this journey as I struggled with homesickness, anxiety and fatigue. I needed time to myself and I needed time to reevaluate the reasons why I am doing this trip and what I need to get out of it.

So for the first three days in Malaysia I didn’t do much. I hung out on the ship, painted my nails, read some magazines and watched about 20 episodes of Friends. I was able to get online and talk to friends from home which helped a lot and for the first time in a long time I was also able to run on the treadmill because the ship wasn’t rocking.

I told myself before I started my run that if I could run 2.5 miles straight without slowing down or stopping to walk than I could get through these next 6.5 weeks. So I started running. My hip began to hurt, I was out of breath, sweat was dripping down my face, and I thought I couldn’t do it…but I kept running. I finished the 2.5 mile run, slowed down and realized that every journey whether big (like this trip) or small (like a 2.5 mile run on the treadmill) has easy times and hard times and you have to go through the low points to realize how great the highs are. I did this two days in a row and although still feeling homesick, I proved that the hard times don’t last for long and although I probably wont want to leave when the time comes, I know the time is coming.

My friends returned from Kuala Lumpur on Friday night and my mind finally took a break from thinking about home. Saturday was spent visiting some Buddhist temples in the city and shopping for gifts and souveniers from Malaysia. I got a lot of gifts for people from home (josh- I am still looking for a cricket bat for you…ill try my best to get you one!), and I learned more about the city that I had been sitting outside of for the past three days. Saturday night was my favorite part of the five days we had in Malaysia.

During my couple of days on the ship I heard rumors about a market held at night where you could find DVDs for a dollar and tons of cheap things to buy. My friends and I all went to the street night market around 8pm and we spent an hour flipping through stacks and stacks of DVDs…each only a dollar apiece. I ended up getting the entire SERIES of Sex and the City for a mere $25 and a bunch of movies that aren’t even out in stores yet. I was unsure if they were going to work in my DVD player so right when I got back to the ship around midnight I put a couple of them into my computer and luckily they worked!

Sunday was spent running a few errands, getting food from the supermarket and resting. I went out to dinner with a couple people not in my immediate group of friends, which was a nice change, and we headed back to the ship right on time. As we pulled away from Malaysia I decided to leave that anxiety and homesickness there and start a new mindset for the next couple of weeks.

I have 6 weeks to go until I am back in America and I am going to make the most out of these weeks. Although I know my homesickness won’t go away right now, I also know that it can’t stop me from experiencing Cambodia, Vietnam, China and Japan. I have realized that being homesick isn’t necessarily a bad thing. It means that I have such a great life to return to at home and so many people whom I love to share my experiences with. I am past the halfway point of this run and although it hurts at times, I know it is and will be worth it. The change in me that comes with this run will no doubt be a good one in the end.